www.xantech.com for info on the flashers etc...

You will need:

Connecting block
Power supply
IR Reciever
IR Flashers

You can run some cat 5 to the projector location to the location where the connecting block will be located and attach a flasher to the cat 5 and place it on the projector.

Go with an MX 700 or so... for the remote. It has no fancy graphics and is relatively easy to program. With this set-up you dont need RF and with everything is hardwired, it will be most reliable. If it seems a bit over your head contact a company in your area, it shouldnt take them more than a few hours to complete this task.