Currently a universal ge remote is operating the basic functions, including the dvd and vcr. But the special buttons are not there. Does this help at all? In terms of availability or identifying the right system.

OK, that's good.  Almost cetainly then your combo unit uses the RCA IR protocol, and not the rare Konka protocol.  If that's true, we can make this work and you won't need a cable (DB9 is fine, BTW).

The RCA protocol sends a device number (15 for TV, 5 for DVD, 14 for VCR) and a function number ranging from 0 to 255.  So there are in principle 768 possible combinations, but we already know most of them.  For example VCR Speed is function number 70. 

Remotes made by UEI are unusual in that buttons can be manually programmed for any function number, provided that they have a setup code that sends the correct device number.  There are 50 different UEI remotes (that we know about) which can send the DVD commands, 70 that can do the VCR, and even more which can handle the TV device number.

Can you find an old cable remote, like Comcast, or the Atlas remotes provided by many other cable companies?  Nearly any OneForAll remote would work.  Some Radio Shack stores have the 15-134 on sale for $0.97.  But most RS remotes are not made by UEI, so they can 't be manually programmed.

I think you can find a pretty cheap remote to control your combo unit.